/b/ - Random

only the dead can know peace from this FUN


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 Dress to impress!


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I want to beat the shit out of this guy. force him on his knees and put his little head in the toilet while I smash him on the back of the head with the lid, throw him like a pillow across the room and send him crashing on a pile pallets, hold him by his feet and launch him into a china cabinet full of porcelain plates and then push him down a bowling lane with a broom and make him go headfirst into the pins. I want to batista bomb warwick davis through 3 tables on fire and then chuck 15 cream pies at his face. I want to hold a nut cracker in each of my fists and sock him across his dumbass face left and right while 2 other midgets hold his arms behind his back, and when he's down begging for mercy I want to unzip my pants and piss on his wounds.
Replies: >>334444
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I want to find him in traffic driving with his stupid booster seat, grab him by the hair and smash his head on the steering wheel to make it honk, then take the booster seat and set it on fire and watch him cry. I want to ring his doorbell and when he comes to check who it is I'd kick it down and crush him with it and my bodyweight, then get up and jump on it and flatten him like looney toons. I want to tie his limbs up to a kids soccer goal, gag him and then kick slightly deflated soccer balls at him with all my strength. Is this normal? is this a normal reaction to seeing this guy? I can't be the only one who wants to deliver several fists of fury to the nose of warwick davis and when he's bloody and whimpering on the ground hit him with a small baseball bat that has bike pedals ziptied to it in the shins right?
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TOTAL MIDGET DEATH!!!!!
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I want to take that cricket bat and knock him out cold while he's reading a book in the park, then put him in a chicken costume, spray him with bbq sauce and use a giant slingshot to catapult him into the lion or gorilla exhibit at the zoo. I want to go to one of those fancy award galas, and while he's doing his stupid speech I'd jump on stage, grab him by the scruff of his little suit and toss him across the room into the table that's got the pyramid of champagne glasses and finger food. I want to tape him shut in a cardboard box, hang it from the ceiling and use him as a punching bag for 5 days straight, only taking breaks to piss, eat, etc.
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I want to trap him in a small crate with holes, pepper spray him through said holes, then chain the crate to a truck and drag him for 2 miles across the rockiest and bumpiest road ever, then when it breaks I want to lash him across his back with a leather belt and drag his face across the gravel and force him to eat a bunch of dirt. I want to use an industrial grade stapler and staple multiple layers of his midget clothes to his skin and then rip em off one by one while yelling as loud as I can in his ears. I want to strap him to a conveyor belt that very slowly leads to a series of hydraulic presses and laugh my head off as I watch him panic, then when he's almost at the presses I'd stop the conveyor and right when he thinks he's safe drop a bunch of gym weights on his shins. I want wrap his head in duct tape hold him by his ankles and let him dangle over from a balcony and listen to his muffled screams for a minute, then pretend to pull him back only to drop him in the bed of a pickup truck full of broken glass and mouse traps.
PUT ME IN THE SCREENCAP!!!!
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I want to tail him to his family trip at the lake, hotwire his RV while's having a picnic, take a foul shit in his bed, then drive over his picnic table and keep going towards the lake only to jump at the last second, run up to him give him a quick surprise 1-2 jab combo just to stun him and launch him into the lake to join his RV, then shotgun a beer and belch on his wife and children while they cry. I want to replace his usual barber and when he comes in for a haircut duct tape him to the chair, spin him around until he starts vomiting on himself, then take him and the chair and kick him down a hill. I want to find him playing pool and relaxing in his multimillion dollar mansion, break multiple pool sticks hitting him across the back and head then lift him up on the table and use his forehead as a stick to pocket some balls. seriously, like honest, wouldn't you like to do at least one of these things, at least once? Just as a stress reliever. I can't be the only one.
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I want to find him at some charity event where they play live music, take one of the backup guitars from the backstage and smash him on top of his head with it, then throw him into the bass drum head first and kick the rest of the set on him while he's still down. Then take him to the mic speakers, put his ears next to it set the mic gain to maximum and yell into the mic as loud as I can until his ears bleed, then knee him in the gut and say "here go crowd surfing pal" and toss him on the concrete below since the crowd already scattered in panic.
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Hi, I'm anon, and I wish I could meet warwick davis while buying some groceries at a 7/11. I'd say "it's so cool to meet you" and while he half asses a smile and begins to thank him I'd unexpectedly start strangling him with both of my hands, lifting him up and shaking him around like a doll, then I'd throw him into the hot dog machine and put force him to put his hand on the heating coils, then shove him on the ground and stomp his face in while he begs for mercy. I wish I could then go to his freshly pumped expensive car and throw a firecracker in his gas tank.
Is this one of those guys who makes a career out of their disability only to rant and grandstand about how awful the disability is?
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I want to duct tape warwick davis' mouth shut, then put a unicorn mask on his face and wrap him in a mixture of double sided tape and gift wrapping paper and dump him in a bunch of glitter. then tie him up to a post and put up a sign that says "pinata" and invite all the neighborhood kids to hit the "pinata" with a bat, but not before I show everyone the right way to do it, which is very violent, very very very violent and surgically aimed. I want to sneak at his kids' party dressed as a clown and while they're taking pics I'd choke slam him into the table on top of the cake, then run while honking my nose.
Anon, why so mad? It's probably not a big deal.
Replies: >>334155 >>334162
>>334154
Hust something I had to get off my chest, which isn't unlike what I'd like to do to warwick davis' chest, which is using a cattle iron to brand him on both of his nipples.
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>>334154
This is a retarded and regurgitated /tv/ meme.
It is to be dealt with in the usual manner.
Replies: >>334227
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>>334162
I actually have nothing against lolis or anime, I made a bunch of posts on /a/ just the other week reviewing yani neko which I'm currently watching, I never browsed /tv/ either.

So I'm going to write you up as "insane low IQ nigger who spergs out randomly and yells at his imaginary boogeymen who live rent free in his head whenever something he doesn't understand or like comes up and tries to derail another thread with made up bullshit" since that's the most appropriate label you deserve. people like you also deserve to be beat up to a pulp until they're unconscious, just like Warwick Davis. Speaking of which I wish I could tie him up to a chair on a movie set and break all the movie props on his head one by one. Start with the sugar bottles, plywhood chairs, aluminum bats and then the parts that built the set, then go to the catering table and start smashing real plates and trays on his head, all while the cameras are still rolling. They'd tell him "this is for the blooper reel trust us" and just go to town on him for a good three quarters of an hour. Then, when he's half unconscious half awake strip him naked and dump him in the garbage pile in the back of the studios.
Replies: >>334233
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>>334227
>I actually have nothing against lolis or anime
Then you won't mind me posting this.
>I made a bunch of posts on /a/ just the other week reviewing yani neko which I'm currently watching
Even if that were true, it doesn't absolve you from regurgitating a /tv/ meme.
>I never browsed /tv/ either.
Sure you don't. Your hatred for Warwick Davis, however justified it may be, just came to you organically...
<It did, actually! <long and drawn out written fantasy about hurting and killing Warwick Davis>
Like clockwork.
Replies: >>334240
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Imagine if you could sneak inside his mansion while he's taking a shower and he'd be like singing "Happy together" or whatever while scrubbing himself with some premium body wash and you pull the curtain and he screams like a sissy girl and asks "Who are you? How'd you get in here? This is private property, you need to leave right n-" and right then an accomplice breaks through the wall with an excavator and dumps 600 pounds of live crab on him.

>>334232
I will not argue or try to prove anything to your schizophrenic ass any further, as it'd be a complete waste of time. Any kind of logic would blow right through you and slide off your low iq brain, mockery is the best I can offer you. You are not sound of mind, you are insane, don't forget that. So please, go ahead and spam my thread and attempt to derail it like you did others, you're just proving me right, and it's not going to make me stop posting about wanting to beat up warwick davis like the child of abusive alcoholic parents.
Replies: >>334237
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>>334235
>I will not argue or try to prove anything to your schizophrenic ass any further, as it'd be a complete waste of time.
Is that what you tell yourself in the mirror to keep your fragile sense of self-confidence intact?
>You are not sound of mind, you are insane, don't forget that.
As spoken by a Warwick Davis punter, however justified he may be.
>it's not going to make me stop posting about wanting to beat up warwick davis like the child of abusive alcoholic parents.
I don't particularly expect you to stop. In fact, i suspect that it may have turned into some sort retarded attempt at telling your mom that no, she can't tell you what to do.
I'm sorry that that happened to you.
Replies: >>334240
>>334233
>>334237
I'm not the guy you're responding to but at this point you're just picking fights for no good reason.
Replies: >>334242
>>334240
One user who was critical of me said that I do what I do because I take this board too seriously, or I pay too much attention to this board (i don't remember exactly), and that I do it because i don't have anything that could be called a hobby of some sort.
He wasn't wrong.
Replies: >>334535
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>Yet another unfunny forced meme thread
Go and take your celebrity obsession someplace else, like Leddit or Xitter.
Replies: >>334333
>>334252
bump
>>334139 (OP) 
>i want to beat up the only guy who is shorter than me
nobody cares, joyeuse
>>334242
Do you ever feel like you've lost yourself? I don't mean that in a snide or critical way.
Replies: >>334538
>>334535
I'm afraid that I don't understand. Please clarify.
Replies: >>334539
>>334538
The psychic inspiration of your soul in it's root form or final form.
Replies: >>334541
>>334539
I still don't understand your question.
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