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it's fucking video games, baby


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READ THE RULES


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also known as "not!E3"

Main Show on June 5th at 2PM PT / 5PM ET / 9:00 PM UTC+0
Event from June 5th to June 8th, but usually a few publisher presentations in the days beforehand


<but all the games these days are shit
We know you bedeviled cynic + it's fun to jump into a watchalong and laugh at the trainwreck. This is not a festival, it's a circus. 

Publishers attending haven't been announced yet, but probably will in the coming days / week. In the mean time, if you wanna make a few Squilliams or work on a bingo card of your predictions, here's a thread for it.
Replies: >>307084
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Watching this shit is exhausting and I feel nothing but rage, pain and emptiness at the end.
It's nothing but ads, "indies" and live service updates.

I was almost saved from not watching it 2 years ago due to work, but they changed my shift.
I wish I had the night shift again.
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>>307079 (OP) 
Good thinking on making a thread a month before the event.
Will you be hosting a room for it, OP? Or would you rather have someone else do it? I can do it if needed.

>>307081
>Watching this shit is exhausting and I feel nothing but rage, pain and emptiness at the end.
Take it easy man, it's only retards burning money on ads for their bad >games.
I understand how you feel though, whenever I watch the le comfy games :3 streams my vision turns red from anger over time. Or dark from the tedium.

Also how can you get mad when this thug nigga is on screen?
Replies: >>307148
>>307081
I don't pay any attention to modern games and I am that much happier for it. Doubt i will watch this shit, got much better things to do.
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>>307081
>mfw watching  this shit
Watching vidya burn down while the normalfags eat shit is a fun thing and it is even more fun when I watch it with anons.
>>307084
>2nd pic
What's the point of collecting stuff and put stuff on a shelf if you can't even see it?
If anything, explains his shit taste with Funko pops
You niggers need to get a new hobby besides complaining
Replies: >>307164 >>307175
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>>307163
>Complaining about people complaining.
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>>307163
<Stop complaining guise!!!
<You are ruining MY fun!
<Only positive feedback is allowed! Every game is a 10/10 and the only thing you can say about any upcoming release is "muh hype"!
Kill yourself.
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It's like I'm back on 4chan circa 2013.
Replies: >>307226
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>>307183
>being this butthurt
Nice picture, is that you and your boyfriend? I bet you are the nigger.
>>307184
Alternatively /b/ on this very site.
Anything new?
Is anyone gonna host a stream of this shit after all? Kinda down to see these people trip on eachother in "Who's gonna announce the worst game this year".
Replies: >>309085 >>309091
>>309070
These game trailer streams have gotten so bad that I really don't even care if someone does or not
>>309070
There is absolutely nothing to talk about, other than that Wolverine game from Insomniac that was leaked a while back(it's every bit as bad as the leaks have shown it to be).
So who is going to stream this shit?
hoping for steam frame
June 5th?
That's tomorrow.
Replies: >>309153
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♪ I neeed a stream link ♪
♪ I'm holding out for a stream link until the end of the ni-ight ♪
Replies: >>309167
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If nobody is going to stream it, I will in
https://cytu.be/r/qtmonstergirls
Replies: >>309146 >>309148
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>>309136
Ok the schedule tomorrow will be
>Soy State of Gay - PRESHOW Show on June 5th at 1PM PT
>Main Show on June 5th at 2PM PT / 5PM ET / 9:00 PM UTC+0
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>>309136
Thank you brave autist for your commitment.
>>309114
I'll see if I can get a bingo card out tonight.
Replies: >>309158 >>309167
>>309153
Don't forget to put "Concord game"
Replies: >>309167
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>>309153
>>309158
I couldn't even come up with 24 shitposts without just ripping off >>309129. Holy shit these fags are beyond mockery.
Replies: >>309169
June 5th is TODAY.
You have until the evening to prepare your anus.
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>>309167
And of course as soon as I say that I come up with 4 more.
>>309169
Few easy ones
>MHWilds DLC
>Deborah Wilson
>>309169
You should add gay representation and niggers.
Replies: >>309180
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>>309179
If it's a guarantee, it doesn't count as a prediction now does it?
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>>309169
FAK U GWEILLO CHINA NUMBAH WAN
>>309169
Unwanted political commentary
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THE ABSOLUTE STATE OF SOY GAYMING IN
1 HOUR!
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Are they even doing anything for Caligula's 10th anniversary?

I mean, I know better than to expect much from FuRyu these days, but damn, at least give me something to shitpost about!
THE STATE OF PLAY RIGHT NOW! GET IN!
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OOOH YEAH VIDEOGAMES!!
Replies: >>309212 >>309288
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>>309211
Replies: >>309217
>>309212
A ching chong bing bong you too lady.
Replies: >>309221
>>309217
>tupac and snoop
Explains why whatshisface left RGG because this is just fucking retarded.
Replies: >>309222 >>309225
>>309221
I must have missed something, is Stranger than Heaven part of the Yakuza franchise or is this the new game made by one of it's creators?
Either way, meme title, won't be paying attention to it. If I need my fill, I will just play Sleeping Dogs again.
Replies: >>309223
>>309222
Might be might not. Either way I have zero hope for it now that they decided to put dead niggers in a game.
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What the fuck am I looking at
>From developers of Naughty Dog and Infinity Ward
Fitting, since this is literally just "Last of Us meets Modern Warfare" slop.
>>309221
That was so gay and lame. RGG sucks now.
The Star Wars X-Com is about the only thing I care about so far because it actually looks like a video game
>rei in sanic racing
Asuka fags blown the fuck out
Replies: >>309228 >>309233
>>309227
Crossovers are gay, I'm over them. The Hot Wheels trailer was more exciting. 
Sonic is still popular with kids, looking forward to them watching this "Evangelion" thing and finding out it has the protag jacking off to a comatose girl towards the end. Thanks, Sega!
Replies: >>309230 >>309233
>>309228
Got to ease them in to baby's first 2 deep 4 u edgefest
>>309227
Both were in.
>>309228
Crossworlds is good, but I wish they didn't do the crossover shit and only had Sega characters. The crossover courses, except for Mega Man, are by far the worst too.
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God, what an awful show. You knew it was going to go downhill fast when the new not-Yakuza game had fucking Tupac in it
How much gameplay was shown, you might be asking yourself?
The answer is the same as always: not enough
Replies: >>309236
>>309235
One game, and it was some shitty chink Dark Souls clone where you fight a carpet
This is your gameplay peek of the evening, folks. Everything else was cutscenes or in-engine cinematics.
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No, nigger pill, you keep your shame here you self responding faggot.
geoff jewed us again with this slop
This is worse than last year. So bland a hollow. I'll go sleep
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I did not watch the thing, what was the moment i should have watched? but i did see some fat ass white milf casting and i saw that SHIFT UP goon squad is releasing Project EVE this time without soyn cuckery, that might be just great, anything besides that? 
yes i saw alien isolation 2 also that seems really fun to play w my gf
Replies: >>309262
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>Our friends from br*tain
Yeah, I can tell
Game looks fine, I guess, looks like a standard kart racer, since they are Rare fans at least I can trust them to make a decent attempt at a Mario Kart/Diddy Kong Racing clone. That Donkey Kong ripoff was surprisingly decent, even if the original Yooka-Laylee will always be known for Jontron's disappearance.
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Presented without comment
Try to guess what kind of "game" this is
>>309248
Kill yourself, kike.
can someone post the schedule of the presentations?
Replies: >>309254
>>309253
Use a search engine, you fucking retard.
Well that was an entirely unmemorable shitshow. Also so many god damn niggers.
But not as many trannies as I expected, which is surprising.
Replies: >>309257
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The only highlight for the stream was Stellar Ass 2 and the worst part was Trine getting niggerfied.
Replies: >>309260
>>309255
Pride shit is on the way out, they fell back to niggers to fill it out.
Replies: >>309259 >>309268
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>>309257
The goyim still fall for nigger shit, doe.
Replies: >>309260
>>309259
I mean, when you got Snoop Dogg in 1920s Sleeping Dogs/Yakuza like game, you know this shit is not going away. 
>>309256
I still stand that the tactics Star Wars game is the best one simply because I know exactly what I am getting. Hard to fuck up those because normalfags don't play them(aside from maybe nu-Xcom and even then that's too much for most of them). 

There was also that Atomic Heart looking FPS horror game at the start, but I already forgot it's name because I already internally called it "Atomic Heart 2". Other than that, entire forgettable stream.
Replies: >>309261 >>309268
>>309260
>star wars tactics
I would play it, but odds are I wouldn't be allowed to make qt Twi'leks.
Replies: >>309264
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>>309245
please answer me i cannot watch whole thing, this gundam seems cool but what is HIGH MOBILITY action??????? why they cannot just show fucking gameplay
 i need to dream what game looks and plays like i hate this trend
Replies: >>309264 >>309269
>>309261
I don't even know any modern Star Wars lore, I just saw what little gameplay there was and knew "yup, this will do".
Oh, and I guess there is Star Wars Pod Racer 2 that looked okay, tried way too hard to take itself seriously but the gameplay might be alright. 
>>309262
Why on earth did you expect there to be gameplay in this slop game fest?
Replies: >>309266
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My notes:

>Absolute State of Play (New shit only, since there was a lot of rehashes)
Marvel Wolverine (Buttonmasher Action)
Marvel Tokkon Characters (Dr Doom, Magneto, Green Goblin & Carnage)
Rayman Legends Remaster (Again)
Bancho the Chef (Nigger Sushi chef)
Kemuri (3 player action game, city-yokai with wallrunning-city-traversal)
The Lost Wild (Stealth with Dinosaurs)
No Rest for the Wicked (Diablo-style topdown by the Ori devs)
Ace Combat Zero Belkan War Remake
Stuntman Hollywood (Driving Game for perfectionists with lots of /tv/ IPs)
Until Dawn 2
God of War Laufey (God of War with no God of War)

>Main SGF Showcase
Resident Evil: Code Veronica Remake
Cuphead (Shovel Knight style)
Alien Isolation 2
Gen Atlas (Shadow of the Colossus with Guns, same director)
Blood Message (Realistic Chinese Historical, similar presentation to For Honor?)
Stranger Than Heaven (Snoop Dogg and Tupac in the 1920's Yakuza game)
Haex (Procedural multiplayer exploration shooter, a la Mortal Shell / the slike with guns)
Dead by Daylight 10th Anniversary thing?
Mortal Shell 2
Sand Raiders of Sophie (Banjo & Kazooie Nuts and Bolts meets Sea of Thieves but in a desert with mechs)
Assassin's Creed 4 Black Flag Resynced
The Last Ronin (Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles by Platinum Games)
Fortnite New Season (Chapter 7 Season 3)
Gundam Rogue Orbit (High budget Gundam, Armored Core style)
Eggstremely Hard Game (It Takes Two style co-op, 2 geese trying to keep an egg intact)
Crossfire (Over the shoulder Military slop, with a quippy cynical middle aged stronk woman soldier)
Control: Resonant (Abstract floaty demons / inception world)
Guild Wars 3 (A "Modern MMO")
Star Wars: Galactic Racer (Pod Racing)
End of Abyss (Top-down space station horror)
Last Harbor (The Forest but set in a harbor with androids instead of cannibals)
Virtua Fighter Crossorads (Latinx Streetfighter vs Triads, 3D world but transitions to 2D fighting)
Runescape Dragonwilds (Generic multiplayers survival-adventure, nothin like OSRS)
Soulframe (Techno-celtic, over the shoulder melee)
Grounded 2 (Honey I Shrunk the Kids)
Mafia Old Country Man of Honor DLC
1666 Amsterdam (Wiccan Witch Assassins Creed)
SAW Genesis (Amnesia-style Saw game)
Star Wars Zero Company (Star Wars XCOM)
Blood of the Dawnwalker (Witcher 3 Devs, but time looping (?) Polish Vampires)
Among Us Story: On Guard (Among Us detective standalone)
007 First Light DLC: BAWNA
Gothic Remake
Aion (Chinky realistic MMORPG)
Wuthering Waves x Cyberpunk Edgerunners crossovers
Monster Hunter Wilds DLC: Ascendance (Floating Islands Biome)
Swords of Legends (Chinky Slike?)
Hot Wheels Infinite Rush ‌(Trackmania arcade-racer style)
Sonic Crossworlds Godzilla + Evangelion crossovers
Sonic Pico Park (2D Flash-tier co-op game)
Attack on Titan 3
Clutch (Cinematic monaco racing game ft. two fresh yung criminal lead MC nigger drivers and an old busted-hag white woman lead supporting character)
Chronicles Medieval (Total War but medieval, more a lean on cinematics / visuals)
Sea of Remnants (Edgy Tweenaged Dolls)
Hitman DLC vs Wiz Khalifa MMA
Palworld 1.0 Update
Wolf Among Us 2 + Wolf Among Us 1 Remaster
Stellar Blade; Bloodrain (cyborg hand2hand combar sim ft. 13yr old girl in a skinsuit with hip sway)
Street Fighter 6 Year 4 (Yasmine OC / Arhun OC / Bosch OC / Tifa Lockhart)
Final Fantasy 7 Remake Part 3: Revelation

>Day of the Devs / Indies
Blood Dungeon (Spelunky but cheap)
Tenebris Somnia (Pixel Point and Click wih live action cutscenes)
Mr. Records (Record shop management + rhythm jumper-platformer)
33 Immortals (Top-down co-op rougelike with 33man matchmaking)
Dreadmoor (Fishing game boat-survival set in Shrek's swamp)
Threads of Time (HD2D TBRPG based on time travel but it's not Chrono Trigger)
N+ Infinityx2 (Online multiplayer version of N)
Into the Unwell (Multiplayer Roguelite but 3D platformer based on grimy 1920's cartoons a la Steamboa Willie)
Bub (Stop-motion ultrahispter narrative adventure game about making art, personal healing and new york city)
Lazy River (Multiplayer Pool Noodle Mount & Blade in the style of Peak)
Proove You're Human (Complete Captchas: The Game)
Ithaca (CYOA drive-along game with branching endings)
Screenbound (3D platformer about playing Gameboy games that line up with the 3D world)
Shot One Fighters (Custom Moveset-card Roguelike 2D Fighting game / a la Slay the Spire vs Street Fighter)
Apple Crumble (Murder Mystery)
Slap Out Of It (Interactive Sandbox / Puzzle based on slapping things)
Super Yooka Laylee Kart (2D Mario Kart spinoff)
Into the Fire (Rougelite Firefighting Extractor Shooter)
Trine 6: Together in Time (Co-op Action-2D fantasy)
When Sirens Fall Silent (3D murder mystery-puzzle, a la Pathologic)





>Later Schedules: 
Tomorrow = Southeast Asian Games Showcase, Wholesome Direct, Story Rich Showcase, Green Games Showcase, Gayming Pride Parade, Frosty Games Showcase (Australia + NZ)
Day After = XBOX Games Showcase 2026, PC Gaming Show, Deutsche Indie Showcase
Day After That = Indian Games Showcase
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>>309264
i did not watch these shows since they were called E3 i think?
>>309257
Red state governors are actually declaring June is "Nuclear Family Month" and shit like that. Either their handlers think pederast oversaturation served its purpose and they're going to move on to something else or these guys think it's a legitimate trend they can exploit.
>>309260
Isn't that the chaebol nepo baby's pet game? He probably just ordered the dev team to do it because he liked listening to Doggystyle as a kid, just like that DJ who got shoehorned into City of the Wolves but without the redeeming value.
Replies: >>309279
>>309262
the gundam game didn't look like gundam at all
>>309265
>Wholesome Direct
I'm looking forward to it.
>>309265
Do you have the time for the shows?
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>>309265
I honestly thought Gen Atlas looked interesting at least. I loved Shadow of the Colossus, ICO and The Last Guardian, so i have no reasons yet to think otherwise. And it has robots and giant mecha battles, hard to go wrong with that
Haex also called my attention, but i'm more wary of that one

>The Last Ronin
Clarification: it's a TMNT based on a edgy bad future spinoff where Michellangelo is the only survivor and aims to kill all the futuristic evil Foot clan by himself
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>>309169
So how many did I get right?
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>>309268
It was already the family month. The commiefags just hijacked it.
> Juno -- ((Roman mythology) queen of the Olympian gods who protected marriage; wife and sister of Jupiter; counterpart of Greek Hera)
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>>309280
Fuck off newfags, it's my hobby, I was here first! :)
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>>309211
>>309280
>>309281
>didn't switch your IP before activating niggerpill mode
Very nice, Will Martin.
Anyhow, here's an old exorcism formula in case you ever want to get rid of your steampunk tulpa demon:

Crux sacra sit mihi lux
Non draco sit mihi dux
Vade retro satana
Numquam suade mihi vana
Sunt mala quae libas
Ipse venena bibas
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OK tomorrow schedule will be
>Southeast Asian Games Showcase June 6 8:00 am PT 
>Wholesome Direct
>Whatever you want later
Stream will end at 1:00 PM PT since /monster/ stream starts at that time.
>>309265
I like these, I'm not interested in co-op extraction whatever or reveal trailers.  
>Gen Atlas
>Gundam Rogue Orbit 
>Control: Resonant
>Chronicles: Medieval
>Sword of Legends
>Virtua Fighter Crossroads
>End of Abyss
>The Blood of Dawnwalker
>Star Wars: Galactic Racer
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