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[Hide] (12.1KB, 447x447) I'm a "truecel," a "subhuman," a "sub-five" with what I honestly feel is one of the worst appearances a human being could possibly have. Because of that, I feel like I'm constantly rejected, ignored and left out. I've missed out on so many basic social experiences that pretty much everyone else seems to have at some point.
My self-confidence and self-esteem are so fucking low that sometimes I feel like I'm even worse off than the so-called "losers" and "incels." Like I'm somehow on an even lower level than them, in a place where I'm basically the only person who exists. I've always felt like the most socially unlucky person in the world. Even other "incels" and "losers" seem to get something out of life, while I get absolutely nothing. Nothing at all.
At first, this made me feel fucking miserable. I couldn't find any comfort or any sense of belonging anywhere, not even in the darkest corners of the internet. I even started having some violent and antisocial thoughts toward humanity because of it.
But after thinking about it over and over again, I eventually stopped feeling sad about it. Because honestly, no matter what we experience or how we live our lives, we're all going to die eventually. The memories people have of living relatively happy lives, of finding some kind of acceptance, belonging, affection or validation, will eventually disappear. And my memories of never achieving any of those things will disappear too.
From our own individual perspectives, eventually it'll be like none of it ever happened. In the end, none of it really makes a difference.
And weirdly enough, I actually feel kind of lucky that there's no afterlife where we'd have to relive our lives forever. If there were, I'd be completely fucking screwed. I'd be stuck forever watching everyone else having experienced at least one moment of happiness while I never got anything.